For Ireland

Liquid threads of colour
Pool across a palette of infinite dimension
Stretching the breadth of human emotion with its thundrous vitality
A canvas of serene sacredness and raw power:
Rolling fields slumber in tranquility, embraced by tangled bushes,
Frothing water of a laundered bed --
A masquerade of faeries shimmering in a wonderland of mist and spray.
Fierce strongholds boldy curse time's passing hand.
They whisper to me tales of their childhood
Of swords and magic and kings.
Standing in the recesses of your spirit
Nature and myth collide in waking dream
Reviving my senses from numb apathy.
I run my fingers along the rough Celtic legends
To suck the marrow of my paramour.
I will revel in the silken coolness of your breath
and forever rest in the arms of your ardent lullaby.
I am home.

It still needs some editing.. but I'll sit on it for a while. In the mean time, here's the first draft.

Acting angst.

So I watched the second half of “What a Girl Wants” the other night, because I was bored and it was on TV. Let me just say that I have great pity for anyone who loves that movie. After about 10 minutes every inch of me felt entirely compelled to change the channel. Amanda Byrnes CAN NOT ACT. Every time she spoke it sounded like she was reciting a script. If it’s good acting, you should never hear a script. “Why are you trying to fit in, when you were born to stand out?” Please excuse me while I throw up. So why did I keep watching it, you ask? Well, for one thing, my parents sat down and started watching it with me… but the main reason I started watching it in the first place is because Colin Firth is in it. And believe me, I am very disappointed in Colin Firth for doing this movie. I mean, he’s about the only thing that’s good in it, but even that doesn’t save it. Why does a really good actor do a movie with a crap actress who is only famous because she’s pretty and she did a kid TV show? The same thing goes for Lindsay Lohan and Hillary Duff. Blech. All these kids, who can not act to save their lives, get to work with these credible actors just because they’re pretty and marketable. There is no justice in this world. Then there’s Jim Carrey, who I am starting to have more respect for as an actor. I saw the Majestic over the weekend and it’s not a bad little film. I don’t particularly like him so much as a comedic actor (although I do have respect for his abilities in that area), but I think he does some good stuff as a dramatic actor (dramatic meaning ‘not comedic’ rather than soap opera, overdone acting), especially in “Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind”. I think Canada should be proud of him. It has taken some time for him to convince me of this conclusion so there it is. I’m sure he’s reading this now and jumping for joy because he now has my respect. I know I would if I were him.
I saw my friend Jenna two nights ago -- I haven't seen her since Christmas. That made me happy. It's always nice when you can see someone who you haven't seen in months and it feels like you last saw them a day ago. It makes you really appreciate your friendship. I think that's what having a best friend is all about. And it feels good.
Cheers.

*Scream*

I'M GOING TO SEE LES MISERABLES IN TORONTO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Join me, as we all curse scanners.

I hate scanners. Stupid stupid machines. And along with the hatred of scanners, comes the hatred of thin wimpy paper. Normal paper? Scans like butter. Wimpy paper? Not so much like butter -- more like a porcupine in a patch of thistle bushes... Do thistle bushes even come in patches? And do thistles even come in bushes? Questions questions questions. Although, I must admit, when I have to de-staple, wimpy paper is easier then normal paper because you can feel the staples through all of the paper. Makes me feel like the Princess and the pea. Only instead of a pea under a matress.. I can feel a.. staple. Through.. wimpy paper. Okay, it's not quite as cool, but hey one has to stay entertained.
Well, I can now say that I officially own a sexy black dress. Really, a female must. And I've been depriving my feminity all these years because I never owned a sexy black number. But that's all behind me now. Yesterday, I bought a sexy black dress. At Le Chateau. Oh yeah. I feel good.
I just scanned in 162 papers at once. Booyah! And now my computer is uber slow because it can't handle my awesome scanning abilities. Stupid machines.
So I found out that Mariska Hargitay (from L&O SVU --- sorry ... I'm not really that addicted but I just recently checked out their website) is an rape crisis counsellor in real life. I think that's pretty cool. I think if I ever got raped (heaven forbid) I would probably go to New York (at least I'm assuming she's in NY becuase that's where they film the show) and get counselled by her. Now, I know what you're thinking.. Steph, you're only saying that because a) you love that show, b) she's pretty darn cool, c) she's famous, and d) she's a golden globe winner. And those are all valid statements my friends. But I wouldn't go to her becuase of that... more because I feel like I know her already. Granted, I feel like I know Dectective Olivia Bensen, not necessarily Mariska Hargitay, but I'm assuming that if she's doing rape counseling I'm sure the sympathy she shows on screen is not far off from the real person. And feeling like you know the person already would definately be helpful becuase then you wouldn't feel as inhibited to tell them things. So that's my reasoning. Here's hoping I will never have to use my reasoning.. but it would be kind of cool to meet her though. :)
I'm a sad sad human being.
Cheers.

Notable Quotables

I feel ugly today. Maybe it's the black hair and I'm just not used to it yet. Or maybe it's my clothes. I don't really know. I mean, what makes a person feel ugly? I'm sure the people we think are the most gorgeous people on the face of this planet feel ugly sometimes. Or all the time. Kind of weird if you think about it. Who's to dictate what's "pretty" and what's not? Why, when I looked in the mirror this morning, did I feel like I wanted to sink into the largest hole I could find because I was so disgusted with the way I looked? Now I know what you're thinking.. Oh boy, here it comes, she's going to come up with some big social philosophical thought here that might change the way we view ourselves.
But I'm not. I'm just rambling.
I don't really have that much to say today (besides letting everyone know that I feel ugly). I had a pretty crappy morning before work. I was pretty tired because I went to Guelph last night and partied it up. Oh yeah. So when I got up it seemed like I hadn't really slept at all.. kind of like I went to sleep and the next thing I remember is waking up. I don't have that very often so it was kind of odd. Then I didn't like what I was wearing so I changed a couple times (that wasn't that crappy, but my self-esteem didn't enjoy it too much), shockingly burned my tongue and lips (you know, when you're not expecting it and then wham! shit!) on my coffee and my mom got mad at me for something. Then on the way to work I spilled my coffee in the car and I almost got hit trying to salvage the ruins. Stupid, I know, but man, was I tired and therefore not really thinking straight. I've never confessed to being an excellent driver, but I'm not really that bad. So my morning got an overall rating of: SUCK.
I've been having lots of dreams lately though so that's kind of fun (obviously except for last night). Recently they've been about Christopher Meloni (that's even more fun) mostly because I'm completely HOOKED on Law and Order SVU. I have three episodes waiting for me tonight because I've been gone these past two nights so I had to tape it. Well, on Tuesday night I wasn't actually gone -- my family and I were watching AFI's top 100 movie quotes ... and wanted to see the top ten which were on during my show. The top ten were pretty good so I think it was worth it. The number one movie quote of all time was (take a guess...) "Frankly my dear, I don't give a damn" from Gone with the Wind. Go figure. "Here's looking at you, kid" from Casablanca made the top ten as well, along with "Toto, I don't think we're in Kansas anymore" (Wizard of Oz), "May the force be with you" (Star Wars) , and "Go ahead, make my day" (Dirty Harry). "I'll be back" "Life is like a box of chocolates" and "Housten, we have a problem" didn't even make the top 15.... stupid really. What do these people know. And 2 and 3 were ones I hadn't even heard before. I mean really. Get it right.
Anyways, that's about all for now... time to get back to work.
Cheers.

Monday, monday.. la da la da da da

Ah... mondays. But there's lots for me to do so it's not so bad. I have these big piles of paper to scan in... which keeps me busy, but the probability of something messing up during the scanning process greatly increases. Oh blech -- cold coffee.
Good weekend for me. Didn't get much sleep but that's okay. Went to a wedding shower for my friend which was fun but wierd at the same time. She's my age... and getting married. I'm not even looking for a freaking boyfriend and she's getting married. Not to mention all the other people I know that are around my age that are getting married. Silly people.
I dyed my hair again..... black. oh yeah. My friend Crystal did it.. Man, Crystal's great.. she pierced my nose, she dyed my hair... she's going places. Yeah, so my hair is black now. My friend Tiffany would call me a "stranger in the land" (she did that the last time my hair was dyed black becuase I happened to be wearing my "stranger in the land" t-shirt -- I never did live down that nickname from her). I'm feeling a little goth, but once I've had it for a few days it will be fine.
Oh, I heard great news on the radio this morning -- Les Miserables is returning to Toronto one last time in September. I'm going. I don't care how much it is. Who wants to come with me??!?!
Almost time for lunch... roughly a half hour. Booyah.
Saw some good movies recently. I went to the movie theater 3 times in the past two weeks. Unusual for me. I saw Star Wars 3, Mr. and Mrs. Smith, and Batman Begins -- all action type movies which is also rather unusual for me. But I guess that's kind of what's playing right now. Star Wars was okay -- the dialogue was soooo sad.. I cringed inwardly whenever someone had to speak. And Hayden Christiansen? Help us all. Mrs. and Mrs. Smith and Batman were both really good, but I think I'd rate Batman higher just because Mr. and Mrs. Smith is too hyped up with the whole Brad and Angelina thing.. and, well, Christian Bale is very nice to look at (and might i add -- this is risky -- even b. Not to mention, Tom Wilkensen and Liam Neeson are in Batman... it doesn't get much better. Although 'Smith' is pretty funny and has some great fight scenes. Another excellent movie that I just recently rented -- The Sea Inside. About a rather hard issue and not one that Christians agree with -- assisted suicide. It's inItalian (I think) with English subtitles. And it really makes you think. It's almost completely clean and totally worth seeing. I don't know, I was so clear on what I thought of euthenasia but this movie really challenges you to really come to grips with this issue. I recommend it to anyone. It also won an Oscar for Best Foreign Film and it's based on a true story.
Well, that's about it for now..... looking forward to watching my show tonight -- haven't seen it all weekend. :)
Cheers.

A business woman? Me?

So here I am, typing a blog since who knows when. I'm currently sitting at my desk at work, trying not to look at my watch too much -- time goes faster that way. It's almost 3 which means I have an hour and half left of work. Whoppee! Not that work is horrible or anything.. actually rather like it.. but the end of the day is the end of the day. Doesn't matter. Right now I'm going through old files and taking all the staples out so that I can scan them into the computer and then file them. I know, it sounds so exciting. My hand is starting to hurt though, from the staple-taker-outer. Poor me.
So work is going great. I can make my own hours sort of thing, I can have lunch when I want to, go to the bathroom when I want to and I even have my own desk! I'm trying to decide whether I want to dress it up a little bit in good ol' Stephanie style... But at the moment it's covered with paperwork and that's making me feel pretty important, so I don't know yet. One thing I do know, though, is that my foot is falling asleep right now becuase I've had my legs crossed for quite some time. Not good. Oh, another thing we get here is free coffee all day long. And yes, I've now officially become a coffee drinker. Sad and pathetic, I know, but all too true. Oo, I'm reaching the end of my pile.. almost time to scan.
So I'm addicted to Law and Order: Special Victims Unit. At least my mom would definately think so. :) Okay, so I watch every day at 7:00 without fail (escept maybe two or three times when I forgot to set the tape and I wasn't home.. pity) but it's such a GREAT show! And maybe I'm just a little in love with Christopher Meloni. But even when he's not featured in a particular episode, though the episode suffers, it's still good. The only thing I don't like about the show is Ice-T. Blech. The guy should cut off that thing hanging from the back of his head (and for those of you who haven't seen the show, I'm talking about his ponytail -- no, he's not an alien). But besides him, the show is so exciting. I don't know why, call me gross, but I find sex crimes interesting.
Anyways, it's almost time to go home so off I go.
Cheers.

I'm still alive..

Here's a recent photo of me... taken and edited by me. It's a fun one. Anyways, I'm still alive people and I've just reactivated my blog. Not that it needed reactivating, I just enjoyed saying that. Blog to follow.

of singing and swearing... but not at the same time

Procrastination -- the evil leach upon my back. I have ample time to write an essay right now before my friend Noah comes over to watch a movie, but what am I doing?? Writing a blog. Because I feel like it. And I don't feel like writing an essay. It's not a long essay mind you, but it's an essay none the less. Blech.
Went to the opera this pastThursday. It was my fourth opera -- my, am I getting cultured or what. Booyah. Sharon, Amy, Noah and I went to see "Abduction from the Seraglio" by Mozart. It was so beautiful. It did not make it into my very favourite opera book (and yes, I definately have one of those) mostly becuase it had a lot of dialogue which I didn't mind, but didn't like as much. But it did have Benjamin Butterfield in it. He is such a cool guy. He came to Redeemer for Opera Day and then he found out that Redeemer students were coming to the show and that was very cool becuase we got a special invitation from him for us to come backstage after the show. Oh yeah. Special invitation from Benjamin Butterfield -- world renown Canadian Tenor.
In other news, I'm completely and madly in love with Colin Firth. *sigh*
The play is going well. Lots of fun, but also rather demanding. Didn't really think this character (Duchess of Berwick) would be as challenging as she is proving to be. Not challenging in a bad way but one really never stops working with her. She's not in the play alot but when she is, she definately ON THE STAGE. She has quite the presence so one can get a little tired. :) But she's an absolute blast to play -- I love taking on her character. She just requires alot of energy.
I just found out yesterday that someone I am somewhat aquainted with has died. I didn't know him really well or anything but it's still a shock. He died in a head on collision. It kind of hits ya hard -- and to make matters worse I found out during my lunch break from rehearsal so I had to go back and go through the rest of rehearsal. Blech, what a weight.
So I've seen Pride and Prejudice (1995 version with Colin Firth -- hence the uber Colin Firth love) twice now in 5 days. All sixish hours. Oh yeah. But I have discovered that this movie leaves me somewhat depressed... mostly because a) I wish we could dress like that -- but maybe not so much the dresses worn in P&P becuase they make them look pregnant, but nice dresses none the less, b) I wish everyone still talked that refined and distinguished and with those accents .. I'm so sick and saddened by the erosion of our English language c) I wish men were still that civil and respectable with the ladies and d) I wish I could find and marry my Mr. Darcy. mmmm.. Or maybe just marry Mr. Darcy period. :) Why oh why was I born in Ontario in this century?? I know, I know, I have a purpose here.. but still.
So I might be going abroad. But not really all that far. This is still very very tentative but I might be going to a Christian film school in L.A. for a semester. It would be my first semester of my fourth year so it's a ways off yet but I have to plan and stuff so I just might do it. I'm pretty excited about it, but I still have to do a lot of research so we'll see.
I'm listening to Josh Groban right now... and he's still amazing. Life is good.

reading shmeading

So I'm supposed to update my blog so my sister can read how much I miss her. Ummm..... okay I'm done. There you go Trish.
hee hee.
Alright, alright. I know I haven't updated or anything of late but I kind of forgot about my blog. I mean, I don't really know if people read this thing so that doesn't make it a huge priority... it also doesn't help that our internet is NEVER working at school. *shaking of fist at computer guys* gr. But it's reading break so I have time and the internet. I know, try to contain yourselves --- that's a uber combination. Funny... that's always how I pictured "uber" to be spelt but now that I type it out, it looks weird. huh.
In local news, I made a recent exciting discovery. I discovered that our library has a pretty impressive movie/dvd collection and that it only costs 50 cents to take out a movie/dvd!! What have I been missing!??!?!?!? Course you have to have it back the next day but I beleive that's the only drawback.. that and that our library is about 10 minutes away. But besides that, I'm totally excited! They have a huge (well, huge compared to any movie rental place I've seen) foreign films section and they have a pretty good selection of "artsy" movies as well a recent releases... wow! I'm so stoked. How did I make this amazing discovery, you ask? Well, I went to the library! Yeah, I know ... shocker. And with all this great selection what did I end up renting? Shakespeare in Love. Yep. Okay, my sister recommended the movie to me, and honestly I didn't really mind it, but Trish, it was not as awesome as you made it sound.. I don't know why it won best picture nor why Gwenyth Paltrow won best actress for it. And it wasn't THAT funny. It had it's moments, yes, but I didn't come out thinking that it was really funny. It did have a stacked cast though... Geoffrey Rush, Rupert Everett, Joseph Fiennes, Tom Wilkinson, Judi Dench.. some talented actors.
Anways enough of my ramblings...
I have to be off.. time to go to church. To those of you in far away countries.. I miss you dearly....

the phantom of the opera is there...

okay... so school is what 2 weeks in and it's already busy. Man alive.. can they not give us a LITTLE break?? And in true form, it's 2 weeks in and Stephanie is (what else) ... procrastinating. Ah it's going to be a great semester.
I'm all alone tonight ... sitting at my computer, listening and singing to the wonderful tunes of Frou Frou (playing very loudly because I don't have any I-don't-really-like-your-taste-in-music roomates around to tell me to turn it down), looking at the different books that I have to read, thinking hmmm... I probably should be reading these, and searching through a decorative bucket full of cassette-tape ribbon to find the fuzzy peaches that I have hidden there. Fun times, let me tell you.
I will be doing a lot of memorizing this semester (sorry, quick change of topic). I don't know if my brain will be able to handle it. I mean, I did a lot of memorizing last semester for Perfect Pie, but this semester the memorization is for three/four different things rather than just one play. I have to memorize a certain number of pieces for my communications class, I have to memorize two big monologues, a song, and lines from a 50 minute play for my preformance 300 class and I'm in the play. And I have to memorize a song for vol lessons -- but that's not as difficult I don't think.... it's different memorizing songs. Ahhh memorization.
I'm also taking voice lessons this semester as I just stated. Fun fun fun... watch out for me in the newspapers... the next Brittany Spears -- right here.
I learned how to waltz today.. the basics, of course, but the waltz none the less. I felt kind of elite and knew exactly what the camera angle is like when they film people waltzing.. you know, when they just show the face of the man or something. Well, I've been there now, and I know what that's like... that might be confusing to some but it makes sense to me. I also learned the merengue which was a lot of fun. Lots of hip action....oh yeah.
I have also decided that it is not cool that three people I love dearly are leaving me. To go across the world. My sister is leaving on the 26th of January for Australia.. she will be there for a year. NOT COOL. And two of my really good theatre buddies at Redeemer, Tasha and Amy, are leaving for a semester at Oxford England on the 21st or there abouts... ALSO NOT COOL. I mean it's very cool for them because I'm sure for all three of them that they will have AMAZING times but it's not so cool for me because a) they are going abroad and I am not, b) they are going to England and Australia specifically and I am not and c) I'm going to miss all three of them terribly -- I will miss my sister more becuase obviously she is my sister, but all three of them will be sorely missed. Sad sad times.
I want to go abroad. It's in the plans. Definately in the plans. Now if my life would just work around my plans. That would be so convenient. And it would also be nice if my foot would stop hurting.

movies seen recently: (out of a potential 5 stars)
Phantom of the Opera **** Very good movie, know the score by heart and they did alright in that dept, haven't see the play but liked this version, one really big misfortune is the dubbing.. not so good there .. but Gerard Butler .... he could make masks a new fashion trend
The Hours **** I really enjoyed this movie -- has some homosexual stuff in it though.
Stage Beauty **** Phenominal ending.. a story about an actor who plays females on the stage in the 1800's when males acting females became "illegal" -- don't know how historically accurate it is.. also some homosexuality stuff but there's Billy Crudup and Rupert Everett
The Village ***1/2 I have to say that it's my favourite of M. Night's movies so far... really really good cast... Joaquin Pheonix, Adrien Brody.. good actors and good looking
Wimbledon *** And that's only because Paul Bettany is in it... other than that not a huge fan... Kirsten Dunst = annoying
** I'm not really all that boy crazy... these movies just have good looking actors in them*** honest

Christmas Time

Merry Christmas! Happy New Year!
First semester of the year 2004/05 is done! On Tuesday, December 21 at roughly 3:00 PM, I handed in my last paper and I was free!!!!! Man did that feel good. :) Now I have next semester to look forward to.. uggh. Next semester is not going to be pretty: Reformational Theology (a 3 hour night course), Canadian Literature, Communications, Environmental science (with a 3 hour lab on top of the regular course), Philosophy of Aesthetics, and 19th Century Drama (which should be a great course but it's third year level and it's at 8:00 AM... grrr). So as you can see, I'm just chomping at the bit to get back to Redeemer!
I'm actually surprised I made it out of 1st semester alive... okay, maybe a strong statement, but I definately worked myself to inhumane lengths. I pulled 3 all-nighters in the last 2 weeks before exams... and I don't think I got to bed before 2:30/3:00 AM once.. not counting exam time of course. I was so sleep deprived that I actually made myself sick to the point where I was throwing up.. pleasant. That also made it harder to get the rest of my papers done because it took me two days to recover. Man, what school will do to you.
My exams went okay. I had rather a bummy schedule ... I had my first exam at 2:00 on Wed. Dec. 15.. History 107. It went alright even though I didn't have alot of time to study cause I had to finish a paper for noon on the tuesday.. second exam was the next day at 9:00 AM.. so no real time to study there either.. that was English 257 though so that was okay. The third exam was the day after English so I had three exams in a row.. it was also at 9:00 AM and man was it a doozy. It was for History 104.. a first year course. I don't think they should make first year course exams that hard. This one was rather brutal and unnecessarily long. Verrrry agrivating. My last exam was on Monday afternoon at 2:00 PM. Theatre 226.. not too difficult. But yeah, we'll see how my marks turned out. :)
Christmas holidays have been wonderful. I haven't really caught up on sleep as I thought I would but the fun times been worth it. Christmas day was spent with the family --- alot of fun. My brother and his wife couldn't be there which sucked, but I got to talk to them on the phone so that was really nice. My neice and nephew were so cute and so much fun. I've simply loved spending so much time with them. My neice speaks like a four year old (she's only 2 and a 1/2) and she is just sooo sweet. My nephew is the cutest little boy, even though he can be a bit cranky. But when he's happy and giggling and making noises.. man what a heart-breaker. :) The girls will be lining up for him I tell ya.
I've also been spending time with alot of good friends too so that has been great fun. It's always nice to catch up with old friends during the holidays and find out what they've been doing and pick up where you left off. I don't know if I'll be able to see everybody I want to so that rather bites but I'm enjoying seeing the ones that I've seen. :)
My eyelids are drooping. I'm tired. I'm sick of being tired. But what can you do. My mom thinks that sleeping past 9:30 is a crime so it's early mornings for me. :)
Oh... and I deeply and passionately despise and loathe dentists. I think putting people through that much pain with sharp metal tools that make horrid scraping noises should be illegal. Either that or I should be exempt from the system. Take your pick oh ye dentists of the world... or just Cambridge. What ever you choose won't really make me like you more though. I don't think it's humanly possible for me to ever like the dentist.

grrrr...

I hate papers.
I hate exams.
I miss sleep.

I love Christmas.

Alright.. school can be done now.

okay, so october 31st was my last entry... it's now december 11... man that's a long time. ahh well... I'm sorry to those who actually read this. I really am. So I guess at this point I would put in all my sorry excuses as to why I haven't written (and there are lots of them) but I'm just going to skip that part because I really don't feel like doing lots of typing.. and besides the fact that me writing this blog right now is a really big procrastination technique (I believe it's the sixth one now, after going to the library, doing dishes, doing some shopping, eating lunch at my grandparents, doing some more shopping, and eating supper with my sister and her friends.. okay so that's seven, but I only counted shopping once) for this rather big paper that I have due on monday (and yes, my first exam is wednesday and I also have an audition on monday). Ahh procrastination. I think my life would be a whole lot easier and a whole lot less stressful it wasn't for that dreadful monster called procrastination. I think it's made a perminate home on my ankle. Why my ankle, you ask? I don't really know.. ask it, not me.
So the play is over. It's actually been two weeks to this date. At this time two weeks ago, I was standing on stage in the wings, listening to the pre-show music and feeling the butterflies in my stomach. I'm actually getting them again, just thinking about it. How weird that we associate bodily feeling with certain moments in time. yeah. I miss the play alot. It's kind of like there's a hole in my life... You work so long on something that means so much to you, you perform it for one week, and then poof -- it's over and you'll never do it again. That has got to be one of the most depressing things about theatre. It kind of hits you hard if you've really emmersed yourself in the play. For me, it hit when I came to church in the box the next day and saw the empty stage for the first time.. I looked up and it kind of hit me, like a shock.. and since I was already a little depressed, I cried through alot of church in the box. I put so much of myself in this play -- it was kind of my life. Especially when we had all that crap about the language and stuff... I was sooo bloody mad about that. If I had had the time I would have written a blog because MAN I would have loved to have vented. Maybe I will right now .. okay, pretend it's about second week of november...
"So yeah, I have just found out that they are going to have restrict our audience to just the Redeemer community... and to make matters worse, they are going give us only three shows.. instead of the regular five. And would those shows be the thurdsday, friday and saturday? Oh no, that would be too much.. it has to be tuesday, wednesday, thursday.. all work days and all days when people have classes. I'M SO MAD!!!! I found out in theatre 226, Sharon told us and yep, as per usual, emotional Steph starts to cry... course I held it in because it was class.. but I had to do some wiping control around the eye area. It just seems like they're making such a mockery of all the work we've done.. All becuase of a couple of "oh my gods". I'm sorry but our story is real life people..."
Okay, I'm going to stop there because I realized that I could keep going for a while. Man, was I pissed.. Surprising how quickly those feelings resurfaced. Of course, that doesn't mean anything now becuase we ended up getting all the "oh my gods" taken out (except for one.. mine of course) and we got all our shows back, but that all happened a week before the show opened so we didn't get near the audience we were hoping for.. pitty. People really missed out.
Each show was so wonderfully different for me. Monday's dress rehearsal went horribly. I got so many notes from Ray and some of them were about loosing text (like, not being able to hear it) and that got to me the most because that is one thing I never let myself do... really frustrating. So I was really nervous for Tuesday's performance... which for me was one of my freshest performances. It was the first time infront of an audience and everything was so new and wonderful. I felt alive during that performance. Wednesday's was a deadbeat. Matinee performance, no sleep the night before due to adrenaline (sp?), dead audience, no laughs.. all around not cool performance -- of course that was the one that they taped. Go figure. Thursday's performance was a solid performance for me. Friday's was our most emotional performance. It started out weird for me because my apron was left on stage so I had to put it on in the blackout and yeah, I put it on backwards.. threw me off for the first little bit. Lindsay (older Marie) got really emotional at her "rape speech" so that got me more emotional than I'd ever been. The rest of the play was just really emotional for us. And Saturday's performance was the last one.. bittersweet.
Well, enough of the play. Since the play has been over I've had to write 7 papers in 2 weeks, plus take a final and 2 quizzes. Let's just say that I burnt out. I haven't had a good night's sleep since the play finished.
But yeah, one of those 7 papers is the one that I'm supposed to be working on right now... It's now 8:30.. I believe I started on the computer at around 7.. pathetic really.
Over and out.

*Sigh* ... Halloween again

Trick or treat.

I like finding new singers.

Well, I'm here at home, sitting with my sister at the computer, listening to a wonderful singer by the name of Hayley Westenra... a New Zealand singer who is kind of like Charlotte Church, but, in my opinion, she might be better (sorry Sharon, but I think she is.. you'll have to hear her -- I think you'd like). Okay, so now she's done and I'm listening to Maire Brennan, who is equally as entertaining. Although she's singing a song right now that I think is supposed to say "change the words, don't change the feeling" but we think it is really saying "change the herds, don't change the feeding". What a funny song.
So I have just had WAY too much theatre rehersal for anybody's good, especially mine. Because we're on reading break right now that means.. lots of rehersal time! We had practice 7-10 Wednesday night, 9-1 Thursday and 10-4 today. Wow. We worked on the second act. And I'm so proud to say that I have basically commited all of act 2 to memory! Yeeehaw! I have one scene that I have to memorize yet, but that should go pretty quickly since in the course of one rehersal I go over those lines at least 4-5 times. Now I just have to work on the stuff at the beginning, and my page and a 1/2 monologue, ending act 1. wahoo. I am starting to get a little nervous -- I have never had to memorize as much as I do for this play .. it's sooo overwhelming.. and the play is less than a month away! ACH! But I'm really enjoying working with the cast and director and stage managers etc.. I love my character and this play seems so ... fulfilling somehow, I don't know.
My head still hurts, but not as much. I'm not too worried since I did some research and I think I sustained a mild concussion when I wacked it on the table. Who knew you could get a mild concussion from hitting your head on a table?!?! But yeah, I've had lots of headaches, dizziness, nausea.. all that fun stuff. Not cool.
So yeah, I'm a little sore, but basically happy. Maire Brennan is still entertaining. And Viggo Mortensen is still darn sexy. Life is good.

Why am I such a klutz?

On top of the blooming headache I have from the bump on the back of my head, I just burned three of the fingers on my right hand. My thumb, my peter pointer, and my middle finger -- the three that I use to write with. What a cruel cruel world.

Buff firemen. My specialty.

Mmmmmmmmm.... Joaquin Pheonix. On friday I went to go see Ladder 49 with two of my roomates Amy and Cheryl.. Okay, first of all, it has come to my attention that I watch too many movies. Honestly, I don't think 2 movies a week is all that bad. I mean really, I am a theatre major.... heeeellloo. And I still get my work done. But yet my roomates tell me that myself and my fellow movie buff, Sharon, watch too many movies. You'd think there would be other things to do besides watching movies (and studying of course) around here. But let me give you an example situation: the other day Sharon and I were scotch free of stuff to do (and in self-denial that I had a paper due in a day) so she said to me "let's do something" ...I frantically searched my brain for something exciting and exhilerating to do other than watching a movie.... and wouldn't you know it. NOTHING came up. Therefore, we watched a movie. Now see, if we had found something to do that really didn't require much energy and that allowed us to escape from our menial existence for a couple hours, then heck, I don't believe we would have watched a movie. But the point in fact is that we didn't. What a sad world we live in.
Okay, so now I come to Joaquin Pheonix ---- so sorry to have put him on hold. Yes, we saw Ladder 49 on friday... I'm still reeling. It was such a good movie. And how much do I enjoy my wonderful Leaf Pheonix. I think this movie was one of his better ones to date. Of course L49 couldn't quite beat his fabulous portrayal of Commodus in Gladiator... but it takes a lot to do that! But this movie is really good publicity for him because he's the big gahoona in this one. Although it makes me kind of sad now that he's becoming way more famous, because he's no longer a wonderful well-kept secret.. :( But this movie... seriously cried and cried. And yet, I came out of there really wanting to marry a firefighter... especially if it is Mr. Pheonix. Yum yum yum. He is one buff and attractive man. John Travolta was surprising alright. I'm not a huge fan of him, but he wasn't too bad.
So yeah, four thumbs up, and definate ownerige when it hits stores.
In other news I hit my head... again. I think I'm going to have perminate brain damage some day. This time I hit the back of my head in that spot right where your neck stops and your head begins. I was sitting down and I went to lie down and I wacked it really hard on a rediculously low children's table. We were having a break during rehersal yesterday. Let's just say the rest of rehersal was rather painful and a little out of focus. I really should stop doing these things.
My cousin Heather got married yesterday. She's three years older than me and we hung out together at every family thing. I'm so incredibly happy for her, yet completely weirded out. It still hasn't really sunk in that she's married -- she's only 3 years older than me! And the family all thinks that I'm going to be next. Yikes. That means I have hit "you-could-possibly-get-married" age. Double yikes. Someone help me.

Women...sheesh

It's been one of those days... you know, when you wake up kind of mopey and it sticks with you the whole day, even though you can't really pin down why you feel that way and everything kind of gross that happens in your day becomes 10x worse and even though some really great things happen to you during the day, you just can't shake the "I'm not in a good mood" feeling... and other people can sense it too and avoid you, which just perpetuates your mood because who the heck likes to be alone. Grr. Thought for the day : If I'm not in a happy mood people, just GIVE ME A HUG! I won't bite, I promise.

Stress should be covered in honey, then thrown into a den of bears. Sleepy bears, who become violently angry when disturbed. And who think you're after their babies. Maybe then I'd be able to relax.

Theatre: the world as we imagine it to be...

How much do I love the theatre. This past weekend, a group of my theatre friends and I decided that we were going to have a theatre weekend. What an AWESOME idea. On friday night we all went to see Ovid's "Metamorphoses" at Theatre and Company. I enjoy Theatre and Company. I had already seen the play (it's a string of myths about love of different kinds) but the second time was just as fabulous as the first. Of course I didn't have as good of seats as the first time... but it was okay.. I could still see all the people flesh that graced the stage (and there was lots of flesh! :P). The set was a big pool which was just fabulous -- provided such creativity and beautful movement that just isn't capable with a normal set. Jealousy burned. I want to play in a pool on a stage.
The next day (after an emotionally and physically exhausting rehersal for Perfect Pie) the same troup of us (plus two more -- one of my friends, Sharon, and another friend) went to the opening night performance of Donizetti's "Don Pasquale" at Opera Hamilton.. I love Opera!!!! I honestly think it is a wonderful form of entertainment. The first act wasn't quite up to snuff to me, in terms of quality of acting... but the singing through out the whole opera was BEAUTIFUL. It had some wonderful chorus numbers and the leads had some fabulous ensemble pieces. The acting did pick up so that was good. I don't know if this opera was better than "Barber of Seville" because Seville was my first opera, and I think that the story line of Seville was funnier and it had one character that was funny through out the opera. "Don Pasquale" didn't really have that... but it definately had its moments that were just wonderful. I mean I completely loved the opera, just in comparison.... We also got to go backstage and walk through the FABULOUS sets -- it was all wild wild west... definately cool.
Anyways.... theatre theatre theatre.... and I only spent 35 dollars in total! Yeah for student tickets and having connections. I love connections.
This morning I drove to St. Thomas with my sister to catch up with the music group 'North of OK' .. they were doing a worship service there and it was also the church that I went to Kansas (where NofOK is from) with, on a SERVE project. Catching up with people is a wonderful thing. Often times rather awkward, but still wonderful.
Sigh. What a wonderful weekend. Too bad I have to leave my theatre fantasy world for another week of classes, papers and torture. Thank goodness I still have Josh Groban to keep me happy. mmmmmm